Essay Day
This Thread will be here for posting essays related to everything you can think about. I thought about this for a long time now and I'm seriously thinking that this makes sense here at XJ. We are a community and I see that people are discussing a lot and writing huge texts about everything related to kreedzing.
I met some people in this community that like writing and reading as much as I do and this is the reason why I opened this thread. You can post your essays here and talk about the ideas given in them with other members of this community.
I think thats enough, you understand the thing I'm talking about here. I'll just go on with the first essay in this thread, written by me. Have fun reading and discussing about it. It's kreedz related essay.
Buried in time 25.03.2009
Back in the days a world record was something that produced a spirit through style. Every demo had an own spirit and when I watched them I clearly felt this spirit. A spirit that revealed perfection and harmony into the way the player moved through the map. I was able to see the heart blood the player had given for it. When I saw how fluently and harmonic the style was into an interplay with the map a spirit was born. This spirit made kreedzing an art for me. Every player had an own style and you could distinguish the record holders just by seeing their personal style. These days the record times were that high, that people always had the chance to care about their style they were playing with. It was accepted as a part of jumping. Only a combination between a good time and a good style made you a complete jumper. An aesthetically way of jumping was heavy weighted in the rating of a good player. Whenever I'm seeing an old record a feeling comes to my mind, that reminds me of my inception. When I'm watching these old demos, I'm not even thinking about a way you could do a better time. It's more like I'm enjoying to watch the player for doing a record that was something unreachable for me in that time. I was just fulfilled with respect and astonishment, while I was looking up to the record holders.
My whole enthusiasm in watching world records was based on admiration and the spirit inside it.
Nowadays this has completely changed. When I'm watching a demo now I'm only examining it for any detectable mistakes. I'm not fulfilled with anything nowadays. I'm just seeing the function into the record. The final time is everything, the only thing I can take with me after watching a demo, is the fact if I could be able to beat it or not. The harmony and the spirit is buried under the endtimer.
Nowadays the records have to be so fast, that theres no time to watch at the style of jumping. You just don't care, if it's not harmonic and fluently. It's again only the fastest way that counts. The only thing you are thinking while watching a new world record is what could have done better, related to the finished time. There is no admiration inside of me and I can't see any spirit. The functionality has suppressed the aesthetic and leaves no space for it anymore.
The spirit got lost while the competition went on. The only thing that really matters to get a world record is still the time, so we shouldn't wonder why people are not taking care about their style in any way. I don't have a style while doing a record, thats why my records are feeling cold when I'm watching them myself afterwards. There is no spirit inside of them, because the only thing I can feel while playing is the time, that is running out. I shouldn't wonder why I dislike watching my demos then.
People are always wondering why kreedzing is slowly loosing it's glamor and the feeling it had in the past. But thats nothing I'm wondering about, since the only thing that made kreedzing attractive was the admiration and the spirit I felt. So it's just logical that my admiration for the game itself is slowly abolishing as well. The fact is, that I'm not impressed by numbers on the endtimer. There has to be more to admire, but there isn't and this is clarifying the misery of my current enjoyment of kreedzing.
chrizZo
26/03/2009 12:29brilliant! lets all start writing ^_^
Yep, today all you see is the mistakes :( It was way funnier watching a demo in the past! :D a0ke <3
Originally posted by chrizZoMaybe you can post your essay again in the essay day thread. It's located in offtopics as well.
You've been at this block for hours, you know the time has been ticking away but you don't care. All that matters in the world is this block, all that matters is getting better and getting across this block, you've had moments of frustration, you've left the block far too early, you've had awful prestafe, but you're still there doing it. You've seen people do this block 10 times, you know further than this is possible so why haven't you done it yet? People message you on steam friends so you reply to them, load the checkpoint and keep going. Your eyes are sore from doing it and you think your wrist might drop off if you did it much longer. You load up that checkpoint at your perfect starting point, you're fully concentrated and you sync up another prestrafe, you're in the air.. left right left right.. you're ready to press you gocheck bind.. you land on the other block.. you did it.. the sound of the longjump mod plays loudly through your headset and you're overwhelmed with the feeling and exhale in relief.
You're playing that map you've played 100 times over, it's not a hard map, you've done almost perfect runs on it plenty of times, but you know you can do better, you've seen people do better. The first rooms go smoothly and you're just playing this map because you enjoy it, you get half way through the map and you're hopping across the blocks.. every jump is flawless and you know this is a fast run. You get to that shortcut that you've practised so many times and you know that you hate this shortcut, as you approach it you get nervous because you don't want to fall now.. this could be the run you've been working towards, you aren't confident you can make it you don't believe in yourself.. you jump.. come on.. you land it and hop to the next block. Now you're excited, you're concentrating.. come on.. left here.. land here.. you can see the end timer and it reads a glorious time, you're mashing strafe to run faster or you're hopping across the ground towards it closer and closer. You're there and you almost break your keyboard mashing your use key. You step back to see the timer with your personal best smashed and you get rewarded with the feeling.
You know that this map is above your skill level, you spend 10 minutes on each section and the bhop parts are incredibly difficult so every time you complete a section you feel good. You're presented with a block just under your personal best distance and you know this wont be easy, you don't expect to be able to do it here and now in the middle of a map but you make it, you feel like a little celebration but you carry on you know this a challenge worth stepping up to. Maybe 40 minutes after starting and having little tastes of the feeling with every successful jump you hit the end timer, you don't care that your time was awful, you don't care that you used checkpoints, you did it and yet again you get to experience the feeling.
The feeling is what makes you want to get out of your chair and cheer at your own accomplishment, it's what makes you immediately want to tell your friend about what you just did, it's the rush of adrenaline and satisfaction that makes you feel great. It's the same feeling you get when you did well in an exam, it's the same feeling you get when you pass your driving test and it's the same feeling you get when you get that 5 man ace against a CS team that you know are better than you. The feeling is what makes me happy to play day in day out, the feeling drives me to improve and rewards me when I do.
My name is epi, I've only ever jumped 250 6 times in my life, I've never come close to a world record, I've never discovered anything new, I've never won a cup and I would get destroyed on any map by a competent jumper, but these aren't my goals, I'm just happy to play.
Which website has provided me with people to respect, displays of godlike skill and provided nearly all the resources a jumper could ever need? Xtreme-Jumps has.
Thank you everybody better than me, thank you everybody I play with, thank you everybody who is a pleasure to teach something to, I plan to keep playing for much longer and I hope everybody else continues to do so too. I hope that in reading this you remember those times you felt great, the memories you will take with you when you move on and the people that were with you when you made them.
Disclaimer: Opinion post.
zhadys style can be summed up in 1 word; clean. If it's possible to get to the next block and then continue the run in 1 fluid motion, making it look like it took zero effort, zhady will have done it. In fact, forget that, even if it is impossible, zhady will do it with his eyes closed and his hands tied behind his back. zhady is the king of 1 strafe, jumping block to block with no slowdown and single strafing jumps people will gladly 5 strafe. Many a demo I have watched and thought that it would be impossible to improve the time, they look flawless, but he'll leave you speechless when he breaks his own record yet again. For the perfectionist, zhady is their God, their idol, their inspiration.
Supa and zhadys styles share a lot in common, and when you hold 16% of the worlds records between you, it's to be expected. Supa differs from zhady because he will look at jumps and think what is the fastest way across here without a care in the world what it looks like to do. What's the result of this? A style similar to zhadys but rough around the edges, that little extra strafe before landing and following those lines that you wouldn't expect to work. Supas demos are the pornography of the kz world, they are exciting to watch and you know he doesn't care about elegance, if you waste a second being elegant he will rip that world record right from under you.
Maybe he has a screw a little loose, maybe he has a bit more blood flowing, maybe his sensitivity is a little higher than most, but a chrizZo demo will make you feel like you're traveling at light speed through a map, he'll be the one swinging his knife at every opportunity and doing inhumanly quick strafes on every jump. A chrizZo demo is one you enjoy watching because you feel like he is enjoying it. You don't have time to analyze his style because before you've thought about the first jump he's done 3 more. chrizZo do you know why you don't feel inspired by a demo anymore? Do you know why you only care about the time these days? Because you don't need inspiring anymore, you are the one inspiring people. Along with anybody who holds a record you are godlike, you might not notice the subtle difference between styles once you're at the top because your focus is on the time, but if you're watching a demo because you like a jumper you start to notice things. The majority of people don't watch demos for the time, they couldn't care less what the number on the end clock is, they watch to be motivated and blown away by someone who has skill pouring out their ears.
When you make a demo you shouldn't feel like anything else matters but the time because you setting that time validates your style, and I can assure you that there are no two jumpers with the same style. You've just done something faster than anybody else on the planet has ever done. Don't worry about there not being any spirit, you're one of the people fueling the fire, spreading the spirit throughout the community below you.
26/03/2009 16:03(edited 26/03/2009 16:03)Can I really post essays which talk about something else than kz? :D
Because I don't think everybody's going to be able to understand them (without any pretention) ^^
Indeed stuff I've written are mostly philosophic ^^
yes, I've wrote a lot of philosophical essays as well. But I just wanted to start posting a kreedz related one, otherwise nobody would pay attention :P
So do it ndR!
26/03/2009 16:14Ok ok, I've written it in french, so I'll post it later in english :)
lol, "My KZ Story"
From the start to the end, the amazement of the KZ world never ends. From the easiest and least detailed map, all the way to the hardest and most detailed map. We can all say that no matter how we look at a KZ map, or the people jumping them, you're free. Free to do what you can do in the map. The style, the texture, the length, the detail, it all comes down to one aspect... Who will endure the pain and annoyance to dominate and ain the record.
When you look at a jumper, and their personal style, what do you notice first? Their strafes, their skill? You may think you're better than them, until it comes down to the 1v1. You are about to destroy your personal best on the map, until you miss the final shortcut, but look, your opponent made the shortcut and killed your time. It looks like you were wrong, but maybe you were having a bad day. Of course, people always find the time to come up with the right excuse why they were beat. My dog chewed my mouse cable and the response time increased. Well, even though that sounds legit to be true, it most likely isn't. I mean, come on, who leaves their mouse cable visible so the dog can get it, mine is behind my desk, and I don't have a dog, but I can still say that excuse.
I remember, it was a long night at a lan center in 2006, the map was kz_man_halloween2004. To this day I remember messing up in the cemetery part, and those ridiculous transparent blocks, don't even get me started. Yet, I still love playing this map because it reminds me of the first day where I learned to jump, and the first day where I used a checkpoint 400 times, give or take a couple. The people in the server at the time were respectful to my failure and continued to ensure that I would accomplish the map in a quicker and more efficient time. The only stopping me from that was when my dad walked into the lan center and told me it was time to go. I went home, and slept, went to sleep and the next day I purchased Counter-Strike for myself. I was still into playing normal CS and interested into knifing, but gradually I only existed into KZ servers. KZM, Digital-Tech, etc. It wasn't until I talked with former KZM member JohnnyB that I knew Xtreme-Jumps existed. I started to go onto XJ for a bit, but because of the server location and my crappy internet, at the time, my ping wasn't so enjoyable. I continued playing on KZM doing normal climb maps, nothing bhop just yet. It wasn't until summer of 2007 that I found a clan server of just bhop maps, MLG (Moonlite Gaming). I found trust in the clan and they finally let join. I wasn't the best bunnyhopper at the time, but with all the help they gave me I was able to bhop with a much better skill. Today, in many servers, PhooGi and my personal server proxx, people know me as a rather good bhopper, quick times on many difficult maps, but that doesn't make me the best.
The last aspect of KZ that I have found to be the most difficult was longjumping. During my time with MLG I was doing constant 235s and couldn't get much higher. My friend, Joel, finally gave me insight on what I should do to get better prestrafes and maxspeed. It took awhile to get the hang of but towards the end of the map d2_mario_bhop I successfully did my first 245, which I later announced to the server that it was my first “green!” From those days forward I have done 250 blocks, 240 bhop LJS and some high 230 highjumps. Today, I do constant 245s and higher, and the occasional 250.
My KZ story doesn't have a plot, and it doesn't have a climax, but I can still say that KZ has really turned the existence of Counter-Strike into a whole different type of game. I'm still a really good normal CS-er, and still have great knifing ability, but what comes first is usually my tendency to always be on a KZ/Bhop server and improve my skill, day to day.
-owned
26/03/2009 19:35(edited 29/03/2009 00:13)That's not kz related, that's not phylosophy related (I'll post some discourses later), that's just something I enjoyed writing a couple of months ago.
Once upon a time a little boy who hadn't grown yet.
Nobody knew his age, he was the only one and kept it like the most important secret of the world. He almost had no friends, no family, he was alone and tried his best to be happy, unfortunately without any succeed...
The little boy felt like the most unfortunate person of the universe, bad things always hapenned to him and unluck followed him like pest, he didn't know what to do, so he was walking all the time, without knowing where he was going. But he didn't care! His only wish was to runaway, where? That wasn't the point, he needn't knowing.
After many years of runaway and hanging around, he found a place he had never went before. He couldn't even see the horizon, it was a giant field, a poppy field...
The weird thing was that there was an endless rail in the middle of the field, he wondered why it was there but not too much : he was tired.
He had walked alot that day, so he decided to sleep a bit, this place was so wonderful, and he was alone and quiet here. No human, no unluck, no problem, no need to think about anything, the real paradise. He simply lay down on the ground, closed his eyes and listened to the nature. He thought this place was perfect, it looked wonderful, but as important, it sounded wonderful!
But suddenly, he opened his eyes, something was wrong.
Indeed, he sprang up as fast as thunder, no sound, the world was multicolor. " What the...? " he thought ; was he dreaming? It seemed not. He turned around and something he hadn't expected at all happened.
He wasn't alone ; a girl was there ; on the endless rail...
He sneaked up toward her, he could only see her back but she looked strangely pretty. When he got close to her, she turned quietly, with gracefulness.
" Who are you? "
He couldn't answer, she was really beautiful, he had never seen such a person before, he was totally amazed and answering was impossible.
" Who are you? "
" Somebody.. And what about you? "
" Somebody " she answered with a lovely smile.
The little boy didn't know at all what to answer, then she said with her shining glance :
" Take my hand "
The little boy hesitated some seconds, and then, took her hand. She started to walk on the rail.
" Where are we going? "
" You will see later, wherever and anywhere, it doesn't matter. Don't ask any more questions, the only thing you got to do is enjoying... "
...It's been one year today that the little boy took her hand, no one knows where they went, no one knows if it was a dream and no one knows if he has grown up. But the only thing we can be sure about, is that they're going to keep walking for a very long time, escorted by happiness, love and passion...
Originally posted by darkflawlessDisclaimer: Opinion post.
zhadys style can be summed up in 1 word; clean. If it's possible to get to the next block and then continue the run in 1 fluid motion, making it look like it took zero effort, zhady will have done it. In fact, forget that, even if it is impossible, zhady will do it with his eyes closed and his hands tied behind his back. zhady is the king of 1 strafe, jumping block to block with no slowdown and single strafing jumps people will gladly 5 strafe. Many a demo I have watched and thought that it would be impossible to improve the time, they look flawless, but he'll leave you speechless when he breaks his own record yet again. For the perfectionist, zhady is their God, their idol, their inspiration.
Supa and zhadys styles share a lot in common, and when you hold 16% of the worlds records between you, it's to be expected. Supa differs from zhady because he will look at jumps and think what is the fastest way across here without a care in the world what it looks like to do. What's the result of this? A style similar to zhadys but rough around the edges, that little extra strafe before landing and following those lines that you wouldn't expect to work. Supas demos are the pornography of the kz world, they are exciting to watch and you know he doesn't care about elegance, if you waste a second being elegant he will rip that world record right from under you.
Maybe he has a screw a little loose, maybe he has a bit more blood flowing, maybe his sensitivity is a little higher than most, but a chrizZo demo will make you feel like you're traveling at light speed through a map, he'll be the one swinging his knife at every opportunity and doing inhumanly quick strafes on every jump. A chrizZo demo is one you enjoy watching because you feel like he is enjoying it. You don't have time to analyze his style because before you've thought about the first jump he's done 3 more. chrizZo do you know why you don't feel inspired by a demo anymore? Do you know why you only care about the time these days? Because you don't need inspiring anymore, you are the one inspiring people. Along with anybody who holds a record you are godlike, you might not notice the subtle difference between styles once you're at the top because your focus is on the time, but if you're watching a demo because you like a jumper you start to notice things. The majority of people don't watch demos for the time, they couldn't care less what the number on the end clock is, they watch to be motivated and blown away by someone who has skill pouring out their ears.
When you make a demo you shouldn't feel like anything else matters but the time because you setting that time validates your style, and I can assure you that there are no two jumpers with the same style. You've just done something faster than anybody else on the planet has ever done. Don't worry about there not being any spirit, you're one of the people fueling the fire, spreading the spirit throughout the community below you.
dude i fucking love reading your posts :o :D
@ xj admins : here`s your weekly writer!
Originally posted by boom.dlldude i fucking love reading your posts :o :D
@ xj admins : here`s your weekly writer!
Thanks man :)
I imagine xj have enough writers with the skills they need though ;)
Except most of them don't even speak fluent english, but they get the job done :)
Originally posted by ownedExcept most of them don't even speak fluent english, but they get the job done :)
They do a very good job considering not one of them is a native English speaker (afaik).
Although.. whenever I see a mistake written on the main page I do want to smash it in to little pieces..
I've always seen the XJ staff being a pretty tightly knit community, and even though I, and I expect a bunch of other people, would be happy to help out, I imagine it takes a bit more than that to be offered the chance to do so.
ndR, that was simply beautiful. Please write more.
28/03/2009 22:59(edited 22/10/2010 18:10)ndR, truly awesome tale. XD
Lol wtf is this.
31/03/2009 05:55don't hate on academically gifted writers!
Originally posted by darkflawless[
They do a very good job considering not one of them is a native English speaker (afaik).
Ahem... :)
You guys are so good at this. Not everyone can write essays, especially that impressive. Please write some more, I just enjoyed reading these here.
:)
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